I am my own worst enemy!
Well, what I mean is, I will often back off from doing something for a little while because my inner voice tells me I am either scared, not equipped, not good enough or just doomed to failure. Life becomes a battle, I’ve learnt to fight the negative nancies in my brain and do things anyway but this takes practice!
If you tell yourself things like this too then you most likely are experiencing low self-confidence, you might be stuck on some negative feedback loop that is affecting the way you think about yourself and, ultimately, your confidence and self-esteem. Negative mindsets tend to have a lot of “always” or “never” talk, creating a sense of entrapment and hopelessness.
Here are some examples of negative mindsets that can lead to low confidence.
“I will never get it right.”
Thinking this way can keep you from trying again, or even trying something for the first time. It makes it only too easy to give up.
“Nobody understands what this is like.”
When you lack self-confidence, a lot of times you assume that everyone else has it together and you’re the odd man or woman out. You may feel isolated, and feel as if others have their lives together while you are still floundering.
“I am totally useless.”
When you lack confidence, you may feel like you don’t have anything of value to contribute, whether it’s to your workplace, relationships, or something else.
“I am a complete failure.”
No one fails at every single thing; but to a person with low self-confidence, it can sure seem that way. You may feel like everything you’ve ever tried has failed, even if this is not true.
“I could never do that.”
Do you see someone with a successful lifestyle you wish you had? If you lack self-confidence, you may have the above reaction. Instead of being inspired and wanting to create that lifestyle for yourself, you look at that person and get depressed, thinking you could never have what they have.
How Can These Mindsets Be Overcome?
In order to overcome these destructive mindsets that lead to low confidence, it’s necessary to reprogram your thought processes. You will need to pay attention to your negative self-talk and immediately change it to something positive.
For example, instead of “I will never get it right,” you could stop that thought in its tracks and think instead, “I have trouble with this, but if I keep trying and seek out the right help, I know I can succeed.” Rather than, “I could never do that,” think, “I would love to do that! There’s no reason why I can’t have that lifestyle if I work at it.”
You may need therapy and/or counselling to overcome these mindsets. But like everything else in life, you can do it if you set realistic goals and have confidence in yourself! If you feel that working with a coach or therapist might be of benefit to you then do not hesitate to get in touch. I offer bespoke sessions that are focused on you and what is going to work best for you.
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